As children, we were taught words or phrases that good boys and girls say at the appropriate time. Of all the words and phrases we were encouraged to repeat as children, the one most often said with the least amount of sincerity was, “I’m sorry!” Do not get me wrong, I said those words when I was instructed, “Tell your sister you’re sorry you called her a name!” As I am saying the words, “I’m sorry!” I am thinking, “I’ll say I’m sorry, but she’s still a brat.” Our parents were adamant in attempting to teach us to be forgiving, and we in turn instruct our children because we realize the importance of forgiveness.
Jesus also understood how vital this part of our human existence is. In fact, he was so committed to offering and modeling forgiveness, that he gave his life to assure my forgiveness for all eternity. But his teaching about forgiveness is not just about eternity, it is very much about how we live in this life. In one of his most crucial life lesson stories, Jesus reminds us that we have a responsibility to demonstrate forgiving attitudes and actions. But it cannot be just lip service, saying it on the outside but not meaning it on the inside. In the parable we will consider in this post, Jesus does not hold back. Forgiveness from the heart is not only a good thing for children, but a necessary thing for the child of God.
In Matthew 18, the disciples need a life lesson on how to deal with people who offended them. These were discussions that focused on their needs and desires. Then Peter, speaking for the rest, asked a question and Jesus turned the discussion around. You will find the entire conversation in Matthew 18:21-36. Bottom line, Jesus wants us to learn that we can experience the joy and freedom that comes in offering forgiveness to those who hurt us by recognizing the grace and mercy of Jesus in our lives.
The disciples learned that forgiveness of others is not optional, it is a requirement. Verses 21-22 say, Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. Peter’s suggestion of seven being a respectable number of times to offer forgiveness was quite generous in his mind. Jewish leaders had devised a system that required you to forgive someone only three times. If they repeated the action a fourth time, you were freed from the obligation to forgive. This was meant to keep human relationships in line. Unfortunately, this was not what God intended. The point of Jesus is this. When it comes to our need to forgive, we are never free to stop. It is our role as godly men to show grace and mercy to people indefinitely. In His famous prayer from Mathew 6, Jesus says it this way in verse 12, “Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.” Jesus taught us to ask him to use the identical criteria when he is forgiving us as we use in forgiving others. That is sobering.
Jesus goes on to illustrate this truth in the remainder of this passage by telling of a king who forgave a huge debt owed to him by a servant. However, this servant refused to forgive a ridiculously small dept owed to him by a fellow servant. A simple truth that Jesus wants us to see is that our sin is so great a debt before a holy God that there is no other outcome but for us to be left in the hands of Satan and his plan of death. Regardless of what we do, that debt is so high we could never satisfy it on our own. Our only hope is to cry out for mercy and then the unpayable debt is forgiven, and we are justified before a holy God, it is just as if I had never sinned. In comparison, the offenses of others against us are minimal. Therefore, failure to forgive them does not sit well with our Lord. “Forgive us as we forgive others!” Forgiveness in not between the offender and me, it is between God and me. Offering forgiveness frees us to fully enjoy the intimacy our Lord desires with us.