NOTE: Due to scheduling issues, this week’s post is a repeat from several years ago.
Through the inspiration of God’s Holy Spirit, the Apostle Paul told his protégé, Timothy that a measure of a man’s godliness is seen in how well he manages his family. This is not surprising since the mandate of Jesus is that as we go through our lives, we focus on opportunities to make disciples. The place we should spend a great deal of time is with our families, thus they are a primary recipient of our disciple making efforts.
This is an important indicator of our commitment to Christ since this command cannot be counterfeited. We may be able to fool some people with pretending we have some of the other qualities we’ve discussed, but this particular injunction comes with witnesses. Our family knows how we treat them, and their lives reflect our effectiveness in ministering well.
To fulfill this expectation, it is necessary to make the care and nurture of our families a priority. A well-managed family doesn’t happen by accident or a strong desire, it takes effort. For something to qualify as a priority in our lives, we must be willing to give it time. This may mean putting less emphasis on other things such as career or recreation.
The second important ingredient in managing our family is consistency. A spouse or child who sees a man act and react one way at home and a different way at church are just going to be confused and may even become angry and bitter. This consistency requires us to be in a constant mode of evaluation and adjustment before God. Our actions often carry much more weight than do our words if the two are in disharmony.
This all comes together when we remember our purpose. In Ephesians 5, God compares the marriage relationship to that of Christ and the Church. As men, we can lead our brides to be holy and blameless. This is done primarily through example and encouragement, not demanding and lording over her. As our children witness this relationship of love, they see godliness in action and will be drawn to follow the example as well. Men, you are God’s appointed spiritual leader in your home. To deny or reject this call is an act of disobedience.
One last thought. Many godly men have had adult children who have turned their back on God and their family. Two points: none of us is perfect and in our best efforts, we may have not connected as well as we hoped with the spiritual needs of our children. God doesn’t ask for perfection, but for our best effort. Secondly, as adults, our children may make poor choices of their own free will, even if they have had a strong spiritual foundation built. Our role in both situations is to continue to love, encourage, and challenge our children to return to the place of honoring God.