I have a friend who I once held as a bit of a mentor. He was definitely an encourager over the years. We both pastored churches where we have served for many years. He started a few years ahead of me in ministry and his church was a different size, but those things didn’t matter in our relationship. There were many times when he was on vacation, I would fill in and preach in for him at his church. Cindy and I even had the opportunity to travel with he and his wife.
I still remember the call that revealed it had been discovered that he was being unfaithful to his wife. It felt like I had been punched in the gut. As the situation unfolded, I learned that he had not pursued an extra marital affair. However, he had made some extremely poor choices that led him to this failure. It began with a connection with a high school friend on Facebook. In the beginning, they shared simple conversations about their life. Soon those conversations evolved into discussions of difficulty she was having at home. My friend is a compassionate guy and began offering advice. She was so enamored with his insight that their conversations began to get increasingly intimate. One thing led to the next and soon he crashed and burned.
What began as a harmless encounter grew into a monster that had devastating consequences. Obviously, he was dismissed from his ministry position which he had held for over 20 years. Although his denomination’s discipline procedures are intended to be redemptive and healing, they still required him to step completely away from ministry for a time to focus on his marriage and personal healing. His wife was not only shocked, but she was also devastated. Due to her grace and a faithfulness to Christ, she agreed to remain in the marriage and work through the pain, but her trust was completely destroyed.
The worst consequence was the reaction of his adult children. Their feeling of betrayal and the hurt they felt for their mom caused them to completely reject their dad for a time; they didn’t want to see him or talk with him.
As a friend, I felt the loss very deeply. I have had conversation with him and expressed my willingness to help in the healing process. But things are different. I understand the feeling of betrayal and the disappointment of seeing a friend cause so much grief. Our relationship is strained because of his embarrassment and shame.
I tell you this true account to demonstrate the power of Satan to destroy our lives if we don’t do all we can to protect our moral purity. You may be reading this and saying, “This could never happen to me!” I’ve worked with many men who have fallen to this temptation who have said the very same thing. This is not about motive; it is about wise choices.
The Apostle Paul gives us this warning in 1 Corinthians 6:18-20, Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.
Protect yourselves by assuring good habits of morality. Protect your family by placing accountability in your life. If you are facing addiction with immorality, find a trusted friend and get the help you need. As men pursuing godliness, Satan would like nothing better than to see your life cause pain to you and those you love. Don’t let that happen! Next week we will discuss some practical tips for protecting ourselves